[ December 1st, 2007 at 9:37 pm ]

Today Twinkie pretended to catch snowflakes in her little paws! I don’t think she got anything because the windows were closed.

[ November 11th, 2007 at 10:21 am ]

If I could change one thing about Twinkie, I’d change her wet nose. I’m not sure if she has allergies (perhaps, like me, she’s allergic to Molly’s long hair) or if her nose is just naturally wet. But that’s neither here nor there. The fact is her nose is sopping wet all the time. And, unfortunately, Twinkie likes to use that nose of hers to show affection and get attention. She tends to seek me out and rub her nose against my knuckles or the back of my hand. It is unbearable, and ultimately it damages her cause. I’m guessing that since she hasn’t figured that out by now, however, she never will. And this is why, if I had one cat-related wish, I’d make Twinkie’s nose soft and dry like Molly’s.

[ June 15th, 2007 at 11:58 pm ]

Twinkie has some strange quirks, which are only somewhat endearing. I’m not talking about her periodic bouts of constipation, which still happen once a month or so; although they have definitely become a part of Twinkie’s personality, I’d rather do without that particular trait. No, what I’m referring to are the small idiosyncrasies. For example, Twinkie’s tendency to lick any hand that gets near her face. Maybe some would say that’s cute, but I disagree. It’s gross. Or the way she always follows me into the closet and immediately climbs onto the chair — why, Twinkie? Why do you do that every time? And why do you sit outside the bathroom each morning, counting the seconds ’til I emerge, then jump into the tub? (At least there’s a nice warm spot on the carpet where she was waiting.) Then there’s the strangest habit of all: when Twinkie gets cold, she shakes her paws. Say, for example, I open the refrigerator to fetch a cold beverage, and Twinkie sticks her nose inside to sniff around. Next thing I know, she’ll be backing away, picking up and shaking first her left paw, then her right. Is this normal cat behavior?

[ April 23rd, 2007 at 10:51 pm ]

I love cats!

Even when they jump on the table.

Even when they eat my iPod earphones.

Even when they leave small turdlets on the floor in front of the litter box.

Even when they have fish breath.

I still love cats!

[ March 9th, 2007 at 3:24 pm ]

Trader Joe’s shoppers may have noticed a disconcerting feature of their two Caesar salad varieties: the packaging of the vegetarian and carnivore versions look almost exactly alike — even down to a drawing of the great dictator himself which adorns both containers. This was how I managed to bring home a salad containing — horrors! — grilled chicken. What was I to do with the poultry? Well, the only avowed carnivores in my household are the cats. I placed the chunks of chicken near their food dishes and every last morsel was gone by morning, having been consumed primarily by Twinkie, whose stomach and appetite know no bounds. I am pretty sure that if I placed a whole Thanksgiving turkey in front of her, she’d be able to eat it in one sitting.

[ March 7th, 2007 at 12:34 pm ]

Cat puke — it’s a fact of life.

[ January 12th, 2007 at 4:21 pm ]

Twinkie was observed straining and puking in the litterbox once again, so I am now questioning my previous conclusion about the magical healing properties of wet cat food.

I wonder if there is a psychological explanation for her ailment, perhaps related to Molly’s recent coup which resulted in her taking the throne of ultimate kitty power in my household. Ever since, Twinkie has been meek and subservient when Molly is around. For example, Twinkie refuses to eat until Molly has first had her fill. Is there a similar, unspoken rule in place regarding the litterbox? Something to cause Twinkie to fear the prospect of using it? I shall get to the bottom of this.

[ January 5th, 2007 at 5:14 pm ]

Warning: Excessive details about cat poop follow.

Dear Twinkie has been experiencing some gastrointestinal issues for the past year or so. The fun cycle begins every six weeks or so with a case of constipation. This gets progressively worse over a period of days, during which time Twinkie gets more and more agitated, visiting the litterbox frequently to push and strain to no avail. Eventually the effort makes her puke, then she strains some more. After a time she’ll get that troublesome piece of feces out and will return to her more normal 1-2 bowel movements per week.

In spring of 2006, I consulted a vet about this problem and he prescribed a nasty concoction named Lactulose, a syrup that treats constipation in cats. I can report that Lactulose works as advertised. Unfortunately, it is also one of the most vile substances known to felinekind. Twinkie hates it more than anything and will spit up the sticky stuff all over the floors, carpets, furniture, and her own fur, in an effort to get its taste out of her mouth. Meanwhile the syrup is nearly impossible to clean off of anything more porous than a vinyl floor. My carpet still has sticky spots from months-old attempts to medicate Twinkie’s constipation. And Twinkie herself will refuse to lick her fur clean to remove the horrible Lactulose. Thus, scrubbing sticky cat fur with babywipes is necessary. Lactulose is indeed a very unfortunate thing. Since Twinkie always gets over her bouts of constipation eventually, I deemed Lactulose unfit for use. Twinkie and I both seemed to prefer to let her deal with the problem on her own.

And so it went, for many months: the strain-puke-strain-puke cycle. A week before Christmas, when Twinkie inevitably entered that cycle again, I thought nothing of it at first. She spent some time straining in the litterbox for a day or two, as usual, but when the vomiting phase began, I noticed something amiss. It was bloody. Blood-tinged vomit is not a welcome sight for a cat owner. Twinkie also seemed shaken, spending the day in self-imposed isolation in the corner of the closet, unmoving and scarily unresponsive. I had also noticed a sudden, alarming weight loss.

This was a bad situation, I wagered, so off to the vet we went. Twinkie was the happy recipient of an enema (her second!) and some tests were done (a “geriatric panel” — my cat is elderly). She stayed the night and the veterinarians all cooed about how sweet and well-behaved she was. (Note: that’s because she’s not smart enough to be distrustful of strangers.) In the end, it was pronounced that there is nothing wrong with dear Twinkie; she’s just not drinking enough water, causing her to get backed up. Solution? Wet cat food, which contains much more water per gram than the dry kibble Twinkie has gorged herself on since she came home with me in early 2000.

It’s working out well so far. Twinkie loves the new food because it’s made of chicken parts, and Molly prefers the dry stuff, keeping costs for me low because I only have to set out one can of the wet food per day. And Twinks has been pooping almost daily for the past two weeks. Yay for cat feces!

[ September 6th, 2006 at 8:34 am ]

At this point, the cats probably think their names are Twinkie-I-Mean-Molly and Molly-I-Mean-Twinkie.

[ August 12th, 2006 at 2:00 pm ]

Here’s a photo of my cat tree mod. I made two “curtains” from a length of felt, punched some grommets into them, and then hung them from nails on two sides of the cat tree to form a sheltered little cat haven. Twinkie, especially, seems to like it quite a lot; she feels safe and comfortable inside, and she has a great view out the window.